You're All I Have
by MrsDrShepherd
Summary: A short MerDer story taking place after episode 5 of Season 3. What happens when the two are stuck in an elevator together?
1. Chapter 1

Two weeks.

It was funny to think how two weeks could seem like an eternity. Two very painful, never-ending weeks. Two weeks. That is how long it had been since she had put the truth out there. She had told him she had broken up with Finn. She had told him, and all he could say was, "Ok."

Ok.

_What was that?_ She couldn't help but wonder today. Actually, she had spent a lot of time since that day thinking about those two simple letters, and the meaning, or lack thereof, they contained. Ok. So simple, so vague, so mind numbingly frustrating. He frustrated her. He always had, and probably always would. But he frustrated her in the good way. He frustrated her in the, I-can't-seem-to-funticon-without-you-so-please-stop-being-an-idiot-and-come-be-with-me kind of way. She hated that she could not, in fact, function without him. This was what had made the last two weeks particularly hard to endure.

_Stop that._ She scolded herself silently. _Stop thinking about him. Just stop._ But her efforts to resist her thoughts were futile. No, Derek Shepherd was not leaving her mind anytime soon. She sighed, and thought back to that moment two weeks ago. She remembered standing there in the elevator, finally telling him what she had been trying to hold back all day.

"_You're here. You're everywhere. And I can't not tell you. You know, I've been not telling you all day because I thought it was kind, and I thought I was giving you space. But I can't not tell you because you're here, and you're you, and….I broke up with Finn"_

"_Ok" _

"_Ok….then….ok. I told you."_

She could almost sense something was wrong with him. But the simple "Ok" that had exited from his lips stung. It stung so much that she could barely form a coherent thought at that point. Her mind was buzzing, trying to decipher the meaning behind the two simple syllables he had uttered. But then he walked out. He left. He left, and the elevator doors closed on her, standing there, feeling stupid, rejected and alone. Always, alone.

Two weeks had passed since then. And they still hadn't spoken. Well, that was mostly because she avoided him. Of course, he was Derek, and he'd tried to speak to her. But she'd avoided him. It was ironic, because the last thing in the world she wanted to do was avoid him. Hit him? Maybe. Kiss him? Quite possibly. Push him to the ground and make sweet passionate love to him? Very likely. But avoid him? That wasn't her plan. It just happened that way. She was hurt, she was confused, but most of all, she was stubborn. So she ignored him, and she avoided him. George and Izzie had provided useful throughout this process of avoidance. He'd call, or come by the house, and they would claim she wasn't there. Even if was sitting up in her room watching him from the window, fighting every urge to run down the stairs and demand answers from him. Demand a response that was more than, "Ok." But she didn't. She stayed in her room, she didn't return his calls, and she found excuses not to see his patients or scrub in on his surgeries. She knew she'd have to deal with him soon. Hell, she wanted to deal with him, she wanted her answers. But instead, she avoided, and she waited. Waited until she could overpower the voice in the back of her mind telling her that his "ok" meant he didn't want her, need her, the way she wanted and needed him. So she waited.


	2. Chapter 2

He walked the quiet hallway thinking of her. Always thinking of her. He walked and he thought of her, and he thought of that moment two weeks ago. Meredith. She had broken up with Finn. She had also kept it from him all day. That didn't matter so much though, he was just relieved that Finn was a distant memory. Although, in that moment two weeks ago, his mind was too clouded to process what she had told him. And he'd said "ok." _What the hell was that?_ He thought angrily to himself. What could have possibly caused him to tell the love of his life, that the fact she had just chosen to be with him, was just "ok." Oh right. He knew just who, or more fittingly, _what_ had caused this. Addison. Words could not describe the anger and repulsion he felt thinking of her at that moment. She was the reason the last year of his life had been close to torture. The reason he hadn't stayed with Meredith. And then he finds out that their attempts to salvage an unsalvageable marriage were all for nothing. He had wasted a year of his life being the good guy, sticking with his wife, because that's what you do.

_Yeah right_. He thought bitterly. He closed his eyes as he continued along the deserted hallway at 3 am and cursed his ex-wife. _Ex-wife_. Well, at least that part felt good. Even if not much else at this point did. He thought back to what Addison had told him in the hallway two weeks ago. The hallway, of all places, he thought incredulously. She had basically revealed that she had only come crawling to Seattle because she found Mark in bed with another woman. _Ha! Talk about Karma_, he laughed angrily to himself. Apart from his anger at her for ruining the last year of his life, and causing him to be too pissed off to comprehend what Meredith had told him in that elevator, he couldn't care less about Addison right now. The only person he cared about was Meredith. And somehow getting her alone long enough to explain himself, and make things right with her.

So he continued along the abandoned hallway towards the elevator, thinking of Meredith. In fact, he couldn't remember a second that had passed in the last fortnight where he hadn't been thinking of Meredith. His Meredith.


	3. Chapter 3

Meredith reached the elevator and sighed. She was exhausted. She was just getting off a particularly tiring 28 hour shift, and was finally going home. Home sure sounded good right now. As it usually did, her mind shifted back to Derek. She had never met anyone that could make her that angry, but also that happy at the same time. In fact, she had never met anyone like Derek, period. At this thought, she allowed a small smile to play across her lips. Then she remembered that she wasn't speaking to him at that moment, and the short-lived smile vanished.

She heard the bell of the elevator, signaling the opening of the doors, and she stepped into the cold metal box. She absent mindedly hit the button for the ground floor, and felt the soft groan as the elevator lurched into action. She stared at the floor, and once more, her mind drifted back to thoughts of Derek. _I wonder what he's doing right now_? _Oh please, get a grip Meredith. This is getting pathetic. Can you contemplate thinking of something else for one minute?_ But she laughed despite herself. There was nothing else to think of at this moment. No matter how hard she tried, there was no escaping her feelings for that man.

She continued to look at the floor, not even glancing up when the doors opened at the next floor, and a figure stepped in.

_Crap._

Without even looking, she sensed it was him. It was weird how he had that affect on her. Finally, she drew her eyes up and met his. Sure enough, there was Derek Shepherd, smiling longingly at her. Yep, as it turned out, there certainly was no escaping him.


	4. Chapter 4

A minute of silence passed, and finally he spoke.

"Hi," he said gently, giving her his custom McDreamy look.

The elevator slowed as it reached the ground level.

Without answering him, Meredith moved to the doors, preparing to make a run for it as soon as they opened. When he wasn't with her, he was all she thought about. But when he was there with her, it was as though she couldn't think. And right now, she needed to think.

Seeing her preparing to escape, Derek moved in front of her and hit the emergency stop button.

"We need to talk." He stated, trying to ignore her furious expression at his attempt to block her exit.

"No, we don't." She replied angrily as she maneuvered her way around him, pulling the stop button out, and bringing the elevator back to life. _Don't let me leave, Derek._ She prayed silently as she fought an internal struggle. Half of her wanted, needed to stay, to hear him out. The other half of her wanted to run.

"Yes, we do." He once again stepped in front of her and hit the emergency stop button, smiling challengingly at her.

_Damn him and his stupid McDreamy smile. It's not going to work on me today!_ She thought hopelessly. Glaring at him, she pulled the button back out, trying not to let the tiny smile escape her lips.

"Just let me explain, dammit!" He begged, exasperated. He sensed that she didn't really want to fight him, so he once again hit the button, bringing the elevator to a sharp halt, and causing the alarm to sound yet again.

"No I'm not speaking to you." Frustrated, yet slightly amused, Meredith pulled the button out again.

Laughing, Derek caught her wrist and hit the button back in. She felt a surge of energy at his touch. As though the fact she hadn't slept in the last 28 hours didn't matter. As though nothing else but the two of them neither mattered nor existed in this moment.

She closed her eyes for a second, and allowed herself to regain her composure, and remember why she was angry at him in the first place. She brushed his hand away and pulled the button out one final time. Instead of roaring back to life, the lights in the elevator went out, and they were plunged into darkness. Their incessant pushing and pulling of the button had seemingly caused the elevator to malfunction.

"Crap."


	5. Chapter 5

Meredith felt around her, her hand coming to rest on Derek's chest. He placed a hand over hers, causing her heart to beat a little faster at the warmth of his touch. As quickly as the moment came, it passed, and she stepped backwards, allowing her back to hit the cold steel of the elevator. She slid down so that she was sitting on the floor, her back leaning against the wall. In the darkness, she heard Derek slide down the wall on the opposite side of the elevator. Although she couldn't see him, she knew he was staring into her eyes.

"Now look at what you've done!" She hissed.

"Me?" He laughed, not able to hide his glee at being stuck in there with her. "You're the one that had to go and pull the button back out!"

"Which I wouldn't have had to do if you hadn't of stopped it in the first place!" She whispered angrily.

"Why are you whispering?" He joked.

She hadn't even realized she had been. "Shut up," she growled angrily.

A few minutes of complete silence passed. The darkness began to unnerve her, and she wondered why lights hadn't come on. And why the hell they were still stuck.

"Derek?" She asked quietly.

Silence.

"Derek?" She repeated, a little more frantic this time.

Silence.

"DEREK?"

"Yes?" He asked casually.

"Why didn't you answer me?" She demanded, clearly frustrated with him.

"You told me to shut up," He stated, though he thought it was pretty self explanatory.

"Oh shut up." She sighed.

"See? There you go again!"

"Derek! Stop it!"

"Stop what?"

"Acting all charming and McDreamy."

"Why?"

"Because you're an ass"

"Oh, that."

"And I'm still not speaking to you." She stated, matter of factly.

Derek sighed, and she heard him get up.

"What are you doing?" She asked cautiously.

In response, he made his way over to her side of the elevator, and slid down next to her. She tried to ignore the warmth that radiated from his body, informing her that he was sitting less than an inch from her. She felt his hand grab hold of hers, his fingers interlocking with her own. Although she couldn't see him, she looked towards him. He raised his free hand to her cheek and she could feel his lips move towards her, hovering dangerously close to her own. His hot breath a fraction of an inch from her own, she closed her eyes and leaned towards him. As their lips were about to touch, the lights in the elevator flickered on, bringing her back to reality. She pulled back, and tilted her head to look at him questioningly.


	6. Chapter 6

"The lights are back on?" Meredith said quickly, slightly confused, and surprised at how disappointed that made her.

Derek grinned.

"You're speaking to me now?"

"The lights are back on…."

"Pretend they aren't" he replied, moving in to kiss her.

Ignoring him, she placed her hand in front of his mouth.

"Hey. The lights are on."

"I'm pretty sure we've established that…" Derek spoke amusedly into the palm of her hand.

"Then why aren't we moving?"

"Don't know. But I'm not about to look a gift horse in the mouth…" He joked, pushing her hand aside, and once again leaning in to kiss her.

At the last possible second, Meredith turned her head so that his lips caught her cheek.

"You need the lights out to kiss me? Should I be worried?" He asked her, feigning seriousness.

"Derek."

"Yes?"

Satisfied she had his full attention; she placed her hand on his shoulder, and leant over to whisper softly in his ear…..


	7. Chapter 7

"Derek…" she breathed gently into his ear, allowing her warm breath to hit his neck, causing his skin to erupt in goosebumps.

"Yes?" He whispered back, listening excitedly and intently.

She lingered there for a moment, and the suddenly, she pulled back and looked at him seriously.

"You aren't getting off that easy" Meredith stated simply.

Derek looked at her in amused frustration.

"Okay, A ) That was in no way fair, and B ) You call being trapped in an elevator with you easy? He asked, clearly entertained.

Meredith sighed in frustration and hit her head gently back against the elevator wall.

"Okay, okay," he relented. "I'm being serious now."

She stared at him. Hard. Trying to read his expression. Usually, the two of them could hold an entire conversation without ever speaking a single word. Today didn't seem to be an exception. His eyes told her that he was ready to talk.

"What do you want from me, Derek?" She questioned him nervously.

Derek looked to the floor, inhaled deeply, clearly collecting and formulating his thoughts. Finally, he raised his eyes to once again meet hers.

"I don't want anything from you." He began softly.

Puzzled, and a little worried, she tilted her head at him.

"What I mean is, I don't want anything from you, Meredith Grey. I just want you. All of you." He finished with a McDreamy smile, staring deeply into her.

She stared at him, a little taken aback. Here was this man, her man, saying things she'd been wanting to here all along. Yet small doubt still lingered in her brain.

"Then, why, "Ok?""

Once again Derek sighed.

"I've been trying to get you alone long enough for the past two weeks to explain"

"I'm listening now"

"Right before I walked into the elevator, Addison approached me in the hallway."

Meredith cringed a little at Addison's name. She hated to think that something that had happened between the two of them, had resulted in Derek hesitating to be with her.

"She told me that she stayed with Mark for two months after I left her. She loved him. The only reason she came crawling to Seattle was because she found Mark in bed with someone else." He paused, allowing Meredith to absorb the information.

Meredith was shocked. Suddenly, she realized why Derek had seemed a little off that day in the elevator. She was about to speak when Derek continued.

"I really could care less about Mark and Addison anymore," he explained, "but I couldn't begin to comprehend that I had wasted a year of my life trying to make our marriage work, when all along, I could have been deliriously happy with you. I was angry, betrayed, pissed. Clearly, my mind was not in a good place at that point in time."

Meredith placed a tiny hand on his cheek, and leant in to kiss him softly, lovingly, on the lips. She allowed herself to linger there for awhile, before pulling back.

"I'm sorry for not giving you the chance to explain. I was hurt, and confused"

"And stubborn" He grinned.

"I thought we were being serious?" She rolled her eyes.

"I can be serious"

"That remains to be seen"

"Meredith."

"Yes"

"I love you."

Meredith thought long and hard, pretending to consider his statement. Enjoying how natural it sounded for him to be saying it to her. After what seemed like an extremely long silence, she smiled up at him.

"Ok."

Derek grinned at her, taking pleasure in her obvious attempt to let him know he was forgiven.

"Ok." He agreed happily.

He leaned in to kiss her, but she put two fingers to his lips to stop him. She had something to say.

"I never stopped Derek." She spoke quietly.

"Stopped what?"

"There were times over the last year when I hated you. But I never once, no matter how hard I tried, stopped loving you. I just wanted you to know that."

"Meredith?"

"Yes?"

"I'll never stop."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

With that, they finally gave into what they had both been praying for the last two weeks. Derek grabbed her face with both hands, and pulled her in to kiss him passionately. Barely stopping for a breath, she pushed him down onto the hard, cold, elevator floor, straddling him. He smiled up at her as she ripped off her lab coat, and tossed it to the corner of the elevator. Next she lifted off her scrub top, and it soon followed in the direction of the lab coat. She leaned down to kiss his neck, and his hands found their way into her hair.

It was then that the elevator doors decided to spring open.

"Damn interns. Damn attendings. I'm taking the stairs." Bailey muttered, glaring at the both of them.

Meredith's face went white, and she scurried to the corner of the elevator to collect her clothes.

"I'm going home" She explained, while hurriedly putting her shirt back on, and rushing out into the hall. She made it a few metres into the hallway, before she realized he wasn't following.

She turned around and saw him standing in the elevator, slightly confused as to what he was supposed to do.

Grinning, she held out her hand, and offered a simple, "you coming?"

Derek walked forward and placed his hand into hers. Finally, he was right where he belonged.


End file.
